b The Longhorn Mafia <$BlogRSDURL$>

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Texas Football: The Oklahoma State Game 

Week Ten: No. 15 Texas (7-2) vs. Oklahoma State(5-3)
Last Week: Texas 28, Nebraska 25; Oklahoma State 41, Kansas State 39
Last Meeting: Texas 36, Oklahoma State 10 (2006)
All-Time Series: Texas leads, 19-2

I'll be honest... I have very little to say this week.

This has been the strangest season of college football that I can remember, and at this point there is nothing left that can surprise me, especially when it comes to this Texas team. The maelstrom of unbelievable events that have transpired nationwide somewhat masks the mediocrity-turned-potential-greatness-relegated-back-to-mediocrity-highlighted by-potential-superstardom that has transpired on the Forty Acres, but when you think about it Texas' season has been in many ways a microcosmic representation of college football in 2007.

Texas has survived three close games with onside kick recoveries in their final moments; they lost a lopsided game to a team labeled by most as inferior that featured touchdown returns of a punt, kickoff and interception; they stood toe-to-toe with a team believed by most superior, and had an opportunity to win until the very end; And they're 7-2 through nine weeks, and ranked among the nation's fifteen best teams, despite only one win against an oppoenent with a winning record.


So what now? I'm not even sure what I'm supposed to think about what I've seen this year. Should I be disappointed? At 7-2 and No. 15? Sure, it could be a sham, but Mack Brown-coached teams often have a tendency to pull together just about the time you dismiss them as underachieving. At the same time I'm not ecstatic that losses in two winnable games are what separates this team from top-ranked Ohio State.

I guess I'm somewhere in between Bill Little, the ultimate sunshine-pumping yes-man, and the the guy (sixth post down) that was so disgusted with the heat and Texas' effort that he left last week's game early, thus missing a historic performance in the fourth quarter. And that's probably not a horrible place to be.

This Week's Game in a Nutshell

I don't know. This game has scared me for six months. I have a sinking feeling that the Cowboys are lying in wait, ready to hand us our third loss.

If our coaching staff can make adjustments prior to the fourth quarter then the Horns could add their second win against a team above .500.

According to NCAA 2008...


TWTWB should return this week

Coming soon...

They Said It...

"Media and fan driven negativity really motivates our team better than praise."

- Mack Brown
Mack Brown Rule No. 8592: When the team plays below expectations, or if anyone sees fit to question decision-making, effort or anything else, blame the fans. For all that he does well, I still wonder why Mack Brown feels the need to take out his frustration on the people that pour millions into this program. Sure, there are plenty of douchebags sporting burnt orange these days, but it ain't their fault that it took a Herculean effort in the final fifteen minutes to overcome a three-TD 'dog.

"Oh yeah, I hear them. You can't let that affect you. We're disappointed just as much as they are."

- Colt McCoy, on boo-birds at DKR
Two things: (1) Booing is pretty asinine (2) Colt, if you're disappointed then f'ing do something about it.

"I'm a MAN! I'm 40!"

- Mike Gundy
I don't think I need a link on this one.

The Things I Think About

How many 3.2 beers does it take to get drunk?

Betcha Didn't Know

Mike Gundy is a man. He's 40.

In the Huddle with "Sir Rod"... and Friends

"Sir Rod" Walker says:

Okay Longhorn lovers...!!!! This is gonna be THE TEST for the Horns! A real test!! This team is known for having the best runnin' backs in the world.....every year! I know. I almost was one. They love to just run up the gut.....(for you ladies..or others who don't know football term)...'up the gut' means 'straight ahead'...right in between the tackles. (it's nothing sexual....not in this context) and they do it well! They will also show a lot of mis-direction plays. They'll make you think they're runnin' one way and will switch directions on you in an instant. Our interior defense has to play smart but grimy, while the secondary needs to stay back b/c they WILL launch one way down the field! They'll suck you in (nothin' sexual.......nor is it crawfish......although tempting) with the run over and over again......then it's bombs away! Offense just needs to execute! enuf said.



Stonie Clark says:

Coming soon...

Tailgate Talk

Eskimo's Joe's is a popular spot in Stillwater. I suppose we'll have to head there, since flying to Oklahoma means we can't transport full-ABV beer with us.

A few other College Football-related Thoughts

  • OU Still Sucks...

  • Fifteen Years Ago this Week

    (note: 2007 marks the 15-year anniversary of the Temple Wildcats' 1992 5A Div. II Texas State Championship, which came during my sophomore year of high school. I'll re-cap that season throughout the fall.)

    Temple destroyed Bryan. I remember this because the Vikings tried an onside kick on the opening kickoff. It didn't work and Temple rolled their way to a 9-1 regular season. Interesting sidenote: Dallas Kimball (who lost in either the first or second round of the playoffs) entered the state playoffs as the No. 1 team in 5A after a narrow win in Week Ten. Had Kimball lost, Temple would have opened the postseason as the state's top team, yet would have technically been the district runner-up, due to a three-way tie in 13-5A with Killeen and Waco.

    By the way, the 2007 Wildcats clinched their first fistrcit title in about 107 years last week. Congrats to Coach Monson and his team.

    Personal Anecdote Involving This Week's Opponent

    Eh, two years ago we saw Barry Sanders at some Bricktown bar the night before the game. I wanted to go up and make a crack about the greatness of Emmitt Smith, but he was swamped with adoring sycophants.

    Semi-Relevant lyric from a great album by a band I miss a lot

    "Too cold to start a fire, I'm burning diesel burning dinosaur bones; I'll take the river down to still water and ride a pack of dogs"

    - Soundgarden, Rusty Cage
    I don't know what the hell it means, and they sure weren't talking about the home of Oklahoma State University, but damn, that's a great song. I'd love to see it on a future Guitar Hero game.

    Deluded/Rational Thoughts from an Opposing Message Board

    I have no desire to visit an Okie State message board.

    The Greg Brown Memorial Pregame Premonition

    Jermichael Finley catches a meaningful pass... we can hope, right?

    Random Oklahoma State parody that's funny, though it could have been so much better

    Prediction: I get extremely bloated from the 3.2 beer.



    Wednesday, October 24, 2007

    Texas Football: The Nebraska Game 

    Week Eight: No. 19 Texas (6-2) vs. Nebraska (4-4)
    Last Week: Texas 31, Baylor 10; Texas A&M 36, Nebraska 14
    Last Meeting: Texas 22, Nebraska 20 (2006)
    All-Time Series: Texas leads, 7-4

    Eight Years.

    Nebraska has not beaten Texas in eight years. Oops... this was last week's theme. Nebraska isn't Baylor. Nevermind...

    Before ESPN created a hypothetical tournament that pitted 2005 USC agaist the likes of 22 mini-Ditkas, the All-Madden team, and Caesar's Roman Legions (captained by star tailback Maximus Decimus Meridius), there existed a college football team so dominant that their closest equal could barely stay within five touchdowns of them in the de facto national title game.

    This powerhouse beat four top ten teams in all, and their closest margin of victory was a comfortable 14 points. The only disappointment in the entire season came when their star quarterback finished second in the Heisman Trophy balloting. By all accounts it was one of the most remarkable performances in NCAA history.

    Twelve years later that once-proud program limps into Austin on the heels of back-to-back losses. Both were blowouts. Both came at home, in a stadium that once saw 47 consecutive visitors leave in defeat. And both were so embarrassing that fans flocked to the exits well before time expired.

    The team in question, of course, is Nebraska. Their 2007 season has deteriorated in recent weeks. Despite a 4-1 start, a three-game losing streak has the uskers at .500 now, with losses likely in every remaining game (at # 19 Texas, #9 Kansas, Kansas State, at Colorado). Athletic Director Steve Pederson has already lost his job, and head coach Bill Callahan is almost certainly soon to follow. In short, 2007 marks the nadir of Cornhusker football.

    It's sad to see an elite program reduced to also-ran status. Maybe they kind of are Baylor...

    But with a tradition of success.

    This Week's Game in a Nutshell

    Run the football. I know that Texas' most successful play these days is for Colt McCoy to escape the pocket, buy time, and wait for a WR to find an open spot, but Nebraska has had difficulty stopping the run. This should be a good week to rebuild Jamaal Charles' confidence.

    According to NCAA 2008...


    TWTWB should return this week

    Coming soon...

    They Said It...

    "I really believe that kick was worth a scholarship at Texas. It kept us in the conference race and it kept us in the national race. If he didn't do anything else since he's been here, I would have thought that beating Nebraska at Nebraska was enough to warrant a scholarship."

    - Mack Brown
    "Who the hell is Bailey?" That's what we all thought last season (for those of us shivering uncontrollably in the stands, it's what we thought once we could think about anything other than the bitter cold). Yet unknown Ryan Bailey trotted onto the near-frozen field, nailed a game-winning chip shot, and -- I'm sure -- got laid every night afterward for the rest of the season. A scholarship had to have been the last thing on Bailey's mind when he drilled that kick. But I agree with mack; it was well deserved.

    "We didn't play well last time we were home. We want to give fans a good show."

    - Brian Orakpo
    If by "good show," Brian, you mean, "ass whooping," then I'm on board.

    "I’ve done an excellent job in every area. It’s hard for the media to know, but what we’ve done off the field, and what we’ve done on the field. I think it’s well-documented."

    - Bill Callahan
    Sure you have, Bill. I'm reminded of an employee review I did recently. The subject chose to look past chronic absenteeism, low quality work, and a sense of entitlement matched only by incredible laziness, and award ratings of "outstanding" or "exceeds expectations" across the board on the self-review portion. I suspect Dr. Tom will choose to excercise more rational judgment, as I did, when it comes time to true up the inflated self-assessment

    The Things I Think About

    I'd like to see someone create a video showing the career highlights of Derry, Bobino and Killebrew. Imagine "One Shining Moment" blaring out as Bobino bounces off of the FB on a blitz, or Killebrew hits someone three feet out of bounds, or Derry jumps on the pile when a ballcarrier has been down for a few seconds. Matt wants to tailgate graduation ceremonies this May. I think it's a great idea.

    Betcha Didn't Know

    Nebraskans like to mix their beer with tomato juice, creating a "bloody beer." Yes, it's as disgusting as it sounds. But they love it. If you feel compelled to show a little hospitality this weekend (and you should with these folks) then order them a bloody beer. You're under no obligation to drink one yourself.

    In the Huddle with "Sir Rod"... and Friends

    "Sir Rod" Walker says:

    Coming soon...

    Stonie Clark says:

    Coming soon...

    Tailgate Talk

    This week's menu: corn. Corn on the Cob. Corn Chips. Marie's Creamed Corn (if we're lucky). But under no circumstances will I partake in any "bloody beer." Additionally, we're bringing back an old tradition this week -- the Friday night tailgate. Look for a special appearance by the Sidetrack's band*.

    *The Sidetracks band will actually perform at Scholz.

    A few other College Football-related Thoughts

  • It's conceivable that no legitimate undefeated teams remain after this week. At this point I'm rooting for a two-loss team to play in the BSC title game, partly because I think Florida may very well be the nation's top team

  • Is there a reason that SEC fans are so in love with their conference? I don't understand how these teams can hate each other with such fury, but yet pull together to proclaim their collective greatness.

  • Les Miles may keep finding ways to win, but he's still horrible.

  • That said, I do agree with Stewart Mandel that LSU has demonstrated as much, if not more, than Ohio State when it comes to being the best team in the country.

  • Texas Tech... yep, that's about right.

  • OU Still Sucks...

  • Fifteen Years Ago this Week

    (note: 2007 marks the 15-year anniversary of the Temple Wildcats' 1992 5A Div. II Texas State Championship, which came during my sophomore year of high school. I'll re-cap that season throughout the fall.)

    Temple beat either Killeen Ellison or Copperas Cove. I don't really remember which. No matter, it was a mauling.

    Personal Anecdote Involving This Week's Opponent

    Last year Matt and I, along with his girlfriend and her parents, roadtripped from Austin to Lincoln. The drive wasn't honestly that bad -- at least not "bloody beer" bad. Anyway... we spent Friday evening at Sidetrack's, a Lincoln bar especially popular with the younger crowd. For those familiar with Pete's on Sixth Street, think of Sidetrack's as Pete's, but cruder, and with pitcher upon pitcher of "bloody beer." The tomato juice-infused concotions and terrible bar food aside, Sidetrack's provided plenty of eye candy and ample entertainment, complete with repeated choruses of "Screw the Sooners" from the Sidetrack's band. Yours truly even matched livers with a local in a chugging contest. I lost. What can I say? Midwesterner's can drink beer.

    Semi-Relevant lyric from a fellow Texan (who attended Texas Tech)

    "I wanna go time travelin' through Texas you and me
    I wanna be there, breathe the air and see all I can see
    In my Texas time travelin' machine"

    - Cory Morrow
    Last year Ryan Bailey punched through a field goal in a driving snowstorm. Four years earlier Nate Vasher snared an interception inside his own five. From 1996-99 fans saw James Brown convert fourth and inches, Major Applewhite complete a desparation touchdown heave across his body, and Mike Jones rumble a couple of dozen yards to paydirt. They represent five signature moments in five exhilerating Texas wins over Nebraska. One-sided or not, this Big 12 rivalry has seen its share of magical moments. It's a shame that Bill Callahan's "dead man walking" routine means fans won't likely get to see another storybook ending unfold -- not without a time machine.

    Deluded/Rational Thoughts from an Opposing Message Board

    Red Reign comments: "Texas shows Nebraska respect"

    Of the other 11 teams in the Big 12, Nebraska seems to be the one that Texas fans most admire. Part of that stems, I think, from the fact that prior to the Big 12's formation, Nebraska owned college football. But even moreso, Texas fans remember the class Nebraska displayed in defeat in 1996, the ovation they gave Ricky Williams in 1998, and hospitality they offer everytime Texas makes a trip to Lincoln.

    Nebraska fans deserve better than what Bill Callahan has given them.

    The Greg Brown Memorial Pregame Premonition

    Jamaal Charles... okay, nevermind.

    Random Texas-Nebraska highlight that hopefully won't need to be repeated on Saturday

    It's worth noting that I found three videos of last year's game posted by Husker fans, though I'm not sure why. One even highlighted the score at the end, despite spending more than four minutes making it look like Nebraska dominated Texas.

    Prediction: Texas won't need any late-game heroics...



    Wednesday, October 17, 2007

    Texas Football: The Baylor Game 

    Week Eight: No. 19 Texas (5-2) vs. Baylor (3-4)
    Last Week: Texas 56, Iowa State 3; Kansas 58, Baylor 10
    Last Meeting: Texas 63, Baylor 31 (2006)
    All-Time Series: Texas leads, 70-22-4

    Ten Years.

    Baylor has not beaten Texas in ten years, and the only thing about that fact that amazes me more that it being a fact, is that is has only been ten years. Look at Texas and look at Baylor and try to make one rational argument as to why a lower tier athletic program like Baylor's could have ever won even twenty percent of its meetings with a power like Texas. Can you do it?

    After drubbings of 63-31, 62-0, 44-14, 56-0, 41-0, 49-10, 48-14 and 62-0, it's hard to fathom that a Mack Brown-coached Texas team eked out a meager ten point win against Baylor in 1998, Brown's first year on the Forty Acres. It's even harder to fathom that Baylor actually beat Texas in John Mackovic's final season (okay, maybe that's not so unbelievable), or that from 1984-1992, the Bears posted a 6-3 head-to-head record against the Horns.

    But that was the case for a significant portion of my 30 years. Playing Baylor used to mean something. In 1990 it meant ending a six-year Cotton Bowl drought in a win every bit as hard-fought as the Aggie game it preceded. In 1994 it meant clinching another conference title (forget the fact that it was five-way tie for second behind a probation-stricken Texas A&M). And in 1989, 1992 and 1997, it meant embarrasing losses that either kept Texas out of a bowl, or accentuated the fact that they were far too abysmal to even think about postseason play.

    Now the Baylor game means an assured win, and in odd years, a chance to go drink beer at George's. Unless you're the Aggies. But that's a different story altogether.

    This Week's Game in a Nutshell

    Remember last week when I said that "Texas could start 11 Scott Derrys on defense" and win? Derry could play on offense in this one and Texas should still win. Hell, Texas could start Richard Walton at QB and have at least a 50 percent chance.

    According to NCAA 2008...

    This section was a bad idea. Or lame. Or both.

    TWTWB is temporarily postponed while Matt tends to family business

    Best wishes to Matt's dad, Gary!

    They Said It...

    "The three older linebackers have won a national championship and played really well for us and done some great things."

    "There’s nothing on tape that says they should not [play]."

    - Mack Brown and Duane Akina, respectively
    Brown and Akina make a combined $4M+ per year to coach football, and I make considerably less to do... whatever the hell it is I do. But I have watched game replays solely to focus on the play of our LB corps, and I don't think you have to possess the football acumen of John Madden to see that Scott Derry consistently fails to make plays, or that Rashad Bobino consistenly runs his way directly into a block, or the Robert Killabrew consistently kills his team with, well...

    "We couldn't see what happened on the tape. Robert is a really good kid who is an emotional player. But we told him that the official called it a penalty, so it's a penalty."

    - Brown
    Are you kidding me? The broadcast showed him lying on the ground with his hand firmly affixed to an opposing facemask. Just because he didn't "face rape" anyone doesn't mean he clearly did not commit a penalty.

    "We don't know what the school record is for dead-ball penalties, but Robert Killebrew has to rank high on the list. Maybe it's time to change his jersey number to –15."

    - The AA-S' "Third and Longhorns" postgame feature
    No way. Robert is a really good kid who is an emotional player, and we really need to double check the tape before disparaging the contibution he makes to Texas Football.

    The Things I Think About

    So I have a wedding to attend Saturday at 5:30. If I stay with friends in Killeen on Friday night I can get to George's tent by 9:00 without having to wake up while it's still dark; I can stay at the game till 2:00, when it should be well in hand; and I can be on the road back to Austin in time to make it home by 4:00. That gives me a solid hour to get ready for the wedding. Now, how many pre-game and halftime beers can I consume without being that drunk guy exhaling Bud Light all over the bridal party?

    Betcha Didn't Know

    Baylor's Adam Stiles kicked a 28-yard field as time expired in the second quarter of the 2001 Texas-Baylor game, cutting the Horns' lead to 28-10. Texas has not surrendered a point to the Bears in Floyd Casey Stadium in the ten quarters since.

    In the Huddle with "Sir Rod"... and Friends

    "Sir Rod" Walker says:

    Coming soon...

    Stonie Clark says:

    Coming soon...

    Tailgate Talk

    Pat Green enjoy's George's Bar. I settle for George's Tent. The ratio of burnt orange to green compares favorably to the ratio of burnt orange to green in the stands. I list burnt orange first because it's the dominant color in both venues.

    A few other College Football-related Thoughts

  • Me, last week in this space:

    "LSU fans are obnoxious. I cannot wait until that team gets beat"
    Kentucky 43, LSU 37. Nice.

  • Oklahoma fans are obnoxious. I cannot wait until that team gets beat.

  • Boise State and Wake Forest played in BCS bowls a year ago. Boston College and South Florida could play in BCS Bowls three months from now. And people complain about a Rockies-Indians World Series?

  • A Javorskie Lane guarantee is worth even less than the street value of a ticket to this weekend's Nebraska Texas A&M game.

  • Half of the Big 12 is currently ranked -- Oklahoma, Mizzou, Kansas, Texas, Texas Tech and Kansas State. So of course that means that Colorado humiliates a Kansas team that actually has to travel more than 80 miles for a game, a rejuvenated Oklahoma State trips up Kansas State, and the loser of Tech-Mizzou plummets, meaning that half of that half finds themselves in the "others receiving votes" section come Sunday afternoon.

  • Callahan-Franchione. Getcha resume ready!.

  • OU Still Sucks...

  • Fifteen Years Ago this Week

    (note: 2007 marks the 15-year anniversary of the Temple Wildcats' 1992 5A Div. II Texas State Championship, which came during my sophomore year of high school. I'll re-cap that season throughout the fall.)

    Temple beat either Killeen Ellison or Copperas Cove. I don't really remember which. No matter, it was a mauling.

    Personal Anecdote Involving This Week's Opponent

    My girlfriend attended Baylor. Misguided though she was, she owns the coolest Bulldog, who I have to admit looks pretty cool in his Baylor jersey. Sic'em, or somesuch.

    Semi-Relevant quotes from The Big Lebowski

    "So every time--I just want to understand this, sir-- every time a rug is micturated upon in this fair city, I have to compensate the-- "

    - The Big Lebowski (not the dude)
    "It's a shame that the Chinaman pissed on your rug, Dude... It really tied the room together."

    - Walter Sobchak
    "The carpet pissers did this?

    - Donny
    I know I wore out The Big Lebowski quotes last year, but leave it to a Baptist school to make uriation a topical matter. And when you're looking for quotes about pissing, look no forther than the Coen Brothers' classic. By now everyone has heard about Baylor assistant coach Eric Schnupp, who had a run-in with the law after relieving himself on a Waco bar last weekend. And here I thought lawlessness at Baylor was limited to skinning cats and shooting teammates.

    Was that last one too harsh?

    Deluded/Rational Thoughts from an Opposing Message Board

    Bayloybear134 wonders: "If we win this saturday will it change your opinion towards Morriss?"

    The lunacy of the premise aside (the whole "winning this Saturday"), Baylor fans should simply count their blessings that Guy Morriss isn't Bill Callahan or Dennis Franchione.

    The Greg Brown Memorial Pregame Premonition

    Robert Killabrew gets a personal foul.

    Random Texas-Baylor highlight that reinforces my opening paragraph

    Before Bo Scaife, David Thomas or Jermichel Finley, there was Pat Fitzgerald...

    Prediction: Baylor's home scoreless streak against the Horns ends... in yet another blowout loss.



    Wednesday, October 10, 2007

    Texas Football: The Iowa State Game 

    Week Seven: No. 23 Texas (4-2) vs. Iowa State (1-5)
    Last Week: Oklahoma 28, Texas 21; Texas Tech 42, Iowa State 17
    Last Meeting: Texas 37, Iowa State 14 (2006)
    All-Time Series: Texas leads, 6-0

    You know what I don't get about about Texas fans? Had you asked any of the 80K or so fans exiting Royal-Memorial Stadium after the KSU debacle, few if any of them would have told you they thought Texas had much of a chance to beat Oklahoma. But a week later, after the Horns came up a few plays short of doing just that, the more hyperbolic/reactionary contingent (aka the vast majority) want to scream to anyone who will listen how Texas football has hit rock bottom, or how the Horns will be lucky to play their way into a bowl game not sponsored by Mattress Mac.

    Come on, you can't have it both ways.

    I know, I know...

    "We're Texas."

    "Texas doesn't rebuild, they re-load."

    "Greg Davis sucks."

    Sure, I act like as arrogant and haughty as the next Texas fan, but sometimes you have to face the facts and realize that there are programs equal to yours. Kansas State does not fall into that category, and as the Wildcats proved in a home loss to Kansas last week, Texas had no business losing that game (much less by 20 points). But in hanging until the end with an OU team that even Vegas expected to win comfortably, Texas showed the desire that had been lacking since Lubbock last year.

    Does "hanging in there" make it okay that they lost? No, it does not. But maybe it does mean that the Texas we saw in the Cotton Bowl is the real Texas, and that the Texas that half-assed its way to meager wins against the likes of Arkansas State and South Florida is gone for good.

    This weekend offers a good opportunity to show that. Stomp a bad Iowa State team on the road like you're supposed to, Horns.

    This Week's Game in a Nutshell

    How bad is Iowa State? They've lost to Toledo, Kent State and Northern Iowa. Texas could start 11 Scott Derrys on defense and Jamaal Charles could spray his gloves with Pam instead of stick'em, and Texas should still win.

    According to NCAA 2008...

    I'm sick of this section.

    Matt hands out the midseason hardware in TWTWB

    Shocking early season loss to an unranked opponent. Loss to Oklahoma. Big win over Iowa State, six straight wins to close out the season. That’s what the 2003 Texas team did. After a demoralizing loss to Arkansas at home early in the season, they then got drilled by Oklahoma in Dallas and looked to be a lost duck, sitting at #20 in the polls. But they got it together in Ames, as Cedric Benson ran for 149 yards, Vince Young and Chance Mock combined for 287 yards passing, and Roy Williams even added a 56 yard pass. Iowa State didn’t even score until it was 27-0, and the Longhorns ended up winning that day 40-19.

    The Horns followed that game up with a blowout win over Baylor in Waco, beat #12 Nebraska at home (VY had 163 yards rushing in that game), pounded #21 Oklahoma State in Stillwater, needed a Chance Mock miracle pass to beat Texas Tech at home, and then beat the crap out of Texas A&M in College Station.

    We won’t mention what happened in San Diego…

    The point of all of this is that yes, we are down right now, 4 straight conference losses, blah blah blah. But if the Horns can have more games like last week and fewer Kansas State games (I hate the fact that we have to wonder which team will show up, by the way), there are still attainable goals. Another 10 win season would extend the nation’s longest streak. We owe Texas A&M for what they did last year. A bowl winning streak is still there.

    The t-shirt fans might be off the bandwagon, but we’re Texas fans, and we’ll be here long after Mack Brown and staff is gone. Let’s hope we can look upon mid-season 2007 as a source of pride, a time that the team bucked up, finished the season out strong and rode that momentum into 2008.

    Who wants to go to New Orleans right now anyways???

    Well unfortunately, it appears that we are at roughly the mid-point of the season. [Play Price is Right failed sound here] But rejoice college football fans, because if it is the mid-point of the season, that means that it is time for the third annual HornMafia Mid-Point of the Season Awards.

    The Chaps Girl Award (MVP) – Michael Crabtree, WR, Texas Tech

    Who the hell else are you going to give it to? John David Booty Booty Booty? Colt Brennan? Jordy Nelson? Ouch. No, we know Tech’s numbers are a result of the system, and yes, he needs to do it against top competition, but Crabtree has 70 catches, 1,074 yards and 17 touchdowns. Through 6 games. We haven’t seen this much scoring since that porn star did 500 dudes in one night. Crabtree is on pace for 151 catches, 2,327 yards and 36 touchdowns.

    The Herschel Walker Award (Freshman of the Year) – Michael Crabtree, WR, Texas Tech

    Who else? By the way, this week Texas A&M defensive back (allegedly) Danny Gorer said that “(Crabtree) is going to have to bring his A game when he faces Danny Gorer. This reminds me when Hitler said “The United States is going to have to bring it’s A game to beat Adolf Hitler.” Or when Ivan Drago said, “Rocky is going to have to bring it’s A game to beat Ivan Drago.” Or when Javorskie Lane said, “Miami is going to have to bring it’s A game to beat Javorskie Lane.”

    The Eric Taylor Award (Coach of the Year) – Jeff Tedford, California

    I don’t say Les Miles because I know he’s going to do something in the second half of the season to screw this up, and I don’t want to embarrass myself like that. Jim Tressel at Ohio State is also a nominee, but I have a thing against sweater vests. Boston College and South Florida? Beat somebody besides a watered-down Auburn (I know, they beat Florida) and an overrated West Virginia team and try to not be in a game with Florida Atlantic in the 4th quarter. No, California has beaten a pretty solid Tennessee team and handled an Oregon team that nobody else has this year in their own house. If they can beat Southern Cal at home on November 10th, they might finally get their BCS bowl.

    The Jeff Blake Award (Worst Coach of the Year) – Charlie Weis, Notre Dame

    Weis won the Coach of the Year award two years ago in this spot, but wow. It took UCLA starting a walk-on quarterback for Notre Dame to notch their first win of the year in October, a game where they only had 140 yards of offense. Perhaps Weis should start videotaping his opponents and trying to pick up some signs, since it is obvious he can’t coach a team to victory. Weis’s biggest “victory” in his tenure at Notre Dame is a “near-loss” against USC. Moral victories didn’t used to fly at Notre Dame. Not that Weis can fly anyhow without buying two seats.

    [Drew: This should be "The Rich Kotite Award"]

    The Northwestern Award (Surprise of the Year) – South Florida, Kansas (tie)

    I made my thoughts on South Florida known above, but you have to give them props for being 5-0 and #5 in the Coaches Poll. We’ll see how good they are in the second half of the season, as they’re not going to sneak up on anyone like they did Auburn. As for Kansas, Jayhawk fans are usually looking forward to March Madness at this time of the year (and probably still are), but they are 5-0 with the meat of the Big 12 schedule ahead of them. Let’s hope Mark Mangino doesn’t eat it.

    The Michigan Award (Disappointment of the Year) – Louisville

    Don’t ask me how I can name an award after somebody and then not give it to them, but at least Michigan seems to have righted the ship and has a chance at the Big 10 title. Louisville, on the other hand, looked to have an inside track to the national championship game with the only team they lost to in 2006, Rutgers, at home. But an early trip-up against Kentucky led to a shocking loss against Syracuse and a just silly loss to Utah at home. Now the Cardinals are just struggling to get bowl eligible with their toughest games (@ Cincinnati, @ West Virginia, @ South Florida and Rutgers) still ahead of them. Brian Brohm might want to pull a Billy Donovan and get a do-over.

    The Quincy Carter Award (Hyped freshman turns into crap) – Bobby Reid, QB, Oklahoma State

    The guy threw for 2,200 yards last year, with 24 touchdowns and 11 interceptions, also ran for another 500 yards. Oklahoma State looked poised to have one of the nation’s most feared offenses in 2007 with Reid, Adarius Bowman and D’Juan Woods (who was injured before the first snap). But Reid struggled against Georgia, was pulled against Florida Atlantic, and then sparked a huge controversy that left Mike Gundy the star of Coors Light parodies on the Internet. But he does have a personal assistant to feed him food, so he’s got that going for him.

    The Let’s Make it Look Like 2002 Award – Texas A&M

    The Aggies managed to make Miami look like the Miami of old when they went into the OB for a Thursday night match-up that they lost 34-17 in a game that wasn’t that close. Miami followed that up with a lackluster win over Duke and then lost to dreadful North Carolina. If only it was 2002, then Dennis Franchione could turn down the chance to do the VIP Connection e-mail which will end up getting him fired.

    The Witness Protection Award – The 2007 Heisman Favorites

    From John David Booty to Colt Brennan to Steve Slaton and Patrick White, nobody seems to want the damn thing. Darren McFadden might end up winning the thing and Arkansas will probably struggle to a .500 record.

    The Drunken Tailgater Award – UTWiz (Jeremy)

    For the third straight year, UTWiz has now won this award. In 2005 it was for his classic performance in guarding the keg during the Colorado game, in 2006 it was for falling in the creek during the Ohio State game, but in 2007 Jeremy took it up a notch and tried to get the crowd amped while watching the game at the tailgate, was reportedly only talking in Ticket drops, ruined a nice pair of Ray-Bans, was doing barefoot laps in the rained-filled parking lot and finally grabbed an old man’s ass in the parking garage.

    The Tim Donaghy Award – USC losing to Stanford

    USC loses to Stanford, which had lost by 38 points to Arizona State, by 24 to Oregon and by 28 to UCLA…alert Vegas.

    The Play of the Year Award – LSU’s fake field goal against South Carolina

    Pretty. Or as they say in the South, “puuuuurty”.

    The He’s So Old We Can’t Really Say Anything Award – Joe Paterno

    Paterno makes it a record 20th straight year winning this award, most recently for his road rage incident this month. Paterno reportedly dressed down a couple and then drove away before the police arrived. Police were said to be looking for a black Model-T with license plate “3”.

    The Why Don’t I Just Throw Money Out The Window Award – Tommy Blake, TCU

    Blake, who many said would be a first round draft pick in next April’s NFL Draft, has now been put on medical leave by the Horned Frogs, reportedly after an “altercation” with coach Gary Patterson. It is not known at press time if Tommy Blake’s mentor at TCU is Barrett Robbins.

    Biggest Game of the Second Half – USC @ California November 10th

    Without a conference championship game, this is it. Cal can finally win the Pac 10 title (if they don’t trip up before then), while USC might be able to work their way back into the national title hunt with an impressive win. Cal might need style points if they have to jump Ohio State for the BCS championship.
    They Said It...

    "I don't remember his name, but I remember that tall, white linebacker with the long hair. He hit me really hard on the first play of the game." "

    - Iowa State WR Todd Blythe , recalling last year's Texas-ISU game
    Folks, I said Iowa State is bad. Need more proof?

    "Before the press conference, I went by every locker and told everybody that if we play like that we've got a chance to win out. I told them that again Sunday after watching the tape."

    - Greg Davis
    You'll get no argument from me. And while I'm at it, that was a well-called game, Mr. Davis. I still think we can stand to get more imaginative on offense, but Davis' gameplan was good enough to beat Oklahoma. And unless Mack Brown's org chart is as incoherent as a John Jenkins play diagram, Davis can't be faulted for continuing to sit Rod Muckleroy, Jared Norton and Sergio Kindle on the sidelines in favor of those other guys.

    "I'm hurting my team."

    - Jamaal Charles on his fumbles the last few weeks.
    Yes, Jamaal, you are. But then again you've helped your team plenty of times in two-plus seasons of carrying the ball. I like the idea of getting Vondrell McGee more involved in the offense, but Jamaal Charles brings far too much talent and quickness to this team to be banished to the gulags. Hold on to the rock and keep finding your way to the endzone.

    The Things I Think About

    Does everywhere now have wi-fi? On the way to Dallas I stopped at Schlotzky's in Waco for lunch. They have wi-fi. On the way home I stopped at Hooter's in Waco, also for lunch, and they have wi-fi. It makes sense for a sports bar, or the equivalent, to provide wireless, lest they lose potential customers that can't watch the NFL without following their fantasy teams (I'm one of these people, by the way...). But why does Schlotzky's need it? And if everyone is going to provide wi-fi, then can't they also increase the number of outlets?

    The Things I Think About II

    If only Jamaal Charles held on to the ball the way Phil Pozderac used to hold on to opposing jerseys, we'd be in the driver's seat for the Big 12 South title. No, it's not a thought unique to me, but why, so many years later, do I still automatically associate the word "hold" with the spareness of Pozderac?

    Betcha Didn't Know

    Iowa State is the only Big 12 team to have never defeated Texas. Don't worry, unless Pete Carroll replaced Gene Chizik this week, I could not have possibly jinxed the Horns.

    In the Huddle with "Sir Rod"... and Friends

    "Sir Rod" Walker says:

    Coming soon...

    Stonie Clark says:

    Coming soon...

    Tailgate Talk

    I don't know about a tailgate, but I'll be enjoying the Horns in HD from the comfort of my home for the first time this season.

    A few other College Football-related Thoughts

  • LSU fans are obnoxious. I cannot wait until that team gets beat.

  • I remember the days when "Upset Saturday" was meaningful, meaning it didn't happen every single Saturday.

  • Javorskie Lane "guaranteed" a win against Texas Tech this week. Until I read that I hadn't realized that 14 years have passed since the Aggies last won in Lubbock. It's not going to happen this year, either, as the Dennis Frachione era will (sadly) begin a farewell tour with a a Red Raider beatdown.

  • Speaking of A&M's biggest rival, the Mike Vick-themed Revielle t-shirts made me feel bad for laughing. 12th Man magazine didn't miss the mark when they labeled the Red Raiders "classless clowns," but that doesn't mean that the Aggies don't bring this stuff upon themselves.

  • Missouri-Oklahoma... Oklahoma plays both offense and defense, so the Tigers won't have it quite as easy as they did last week against Nebraska. But Mizzou has a chance to make a statement against an OU team that could be a little deflated after a harder-than-expected victory against Texas.

  • OU Still Sucks...

  • Fifteen Years Ago this Week

    (note: 2007 marks the 15-year anniversary of the Temple Wildcats' 1992 5A Div. II Texas State Championship, which came during my sophomore year of high school. I'll re-cap that season throughout the fall.)

    Wildcat QB Adrian Woodson made exactly one mistake in his senior season. Deep in Temple terriroty, Woodson looked over the Killeen defense, called for an audible and ran a perfectly executed option pitch. The problem? His running back wasn't anywhere near the pitch. Killeen recovered the ball in the Temple endzone for the touchdown that ultimately doomed the cats to their only loss of the season. Temple had one last opportunity, but a late TD came back on a holding call. Fifteen years later I still have never seen anything that resembled holding on the play, but the bitterness subsided years ago. After all, Temple still claimed the state title, and a year later the cats bounced Killeen from the quarterfinal round of the state playoffs. 42-0. Suck it, Killeen.

    Personal Anecdote Involving This Week's Opponent

    Ricky Williams rushed for a school record 350 yards against Iowa State en route to the 1998 Heisman Trophy and the NCAA career rushing record. Many hours (and beers) after the game, Matt and I stumbled upon the replay, and I quickly popped in a tape so that I record a historic event. Nine years later I have yet to watch that tape.

    Semi-Relevant Song Lyric from, well, the same guys I quote almost every week

    "People lined up to see the Titanic sinking; Instead we rose from the ashes like a phoenix"

    - Kanye West f/ Jay-Z Diamonds from Sierra (remix)
    I listened to this song Friday morning on the way to an abbreviated day of work, and seriously, it made me think Texas could beat Oklahoma. Even though they didn't, I couldn't help thinking about the lyic as I traversed the fairgrounds after the loss. Thousand filed into the Cotton Bowl expecting to see the bell toll for the Texas Longhorns' 2007 season. Instead they saw a team play with the kind of determination that had been absent for some time. Maybe a phoenix rising is a dramatic way of looking at it, but Texas isn't dead after all.

    Bonus Semi-Relevant Song Lyric from a band that's probably never been quoted in a football column

    "If I pretended I was blind, and struck it from my mind, would it still be there?"

    - Pop-punkers Face to Face, Blind
    I heard that on the way home today and thought about Mack Brown trying to convince himself that he's making the right decision in playing "the other guys" at linebacker.

    Deluded/Rational Thoughts from an Opposing Message Board

    Cyclonefan4life asks: How freaking dumb are IOWA fans?

    I thought they were dumb at the Alamo Bowl. Matt told me a story about some pissed-off Iowa fan after the game, who felt it cathartic to rail on how poorly Texas played. The Texas fans within earshot spontaneously launched into a unison of: "Six and Sev-en, clap clap clap-clap-clap."

    The Greg Brown Memorial Pregame Premonition

    Jamaal Charles doesn't fumble.

    Random Texas-Iowa State highlight from a different sport that would be a lot cooler if it had sound

    Prediction: I doze off at some point during a Texas blowout



    Tuesday, October 02, 2007

    Texas Football: The Oklahoma Game 

    Week Six: No. 17 Texas (4-1) vs. No. 10 Oklahoma (4-1)
    Last Week: Kansas State 41, Texas 21; Colorado 27, Oklahoma 24
    Last Meeting: Texas 28, Oklahoma 10 (2006)
    All-Time Series: Texas leads, 57-39-5

    I'm not going to lie; last week felt like crap. It's a good thing Mack Brown owns Bob Stoops*.

    *The past two years.

    Quoting "This Week's Game in a Nutshell" From Last Week's Game

    More Muckleroy and Norton; less Derry and Killebrew. More throwing down the
    field; less throwing bubble screens and hitches. More mixing it up on offense;
    less time spent on page one of the playbook.

    Last year Texas fell prey
    to a confluence of emotion (or lack thereof) and bad breaks. It's unlikely to
    happen again.

    Or maybe it was destined to happen again, being that Kansas State is to Texas as Texas is to Nebraska.

    Take nothing away from KSU, but until Saturday Texas had never surrended a returned kickoff, punt and interception for touchdowns... in the same season, much less the same game. The Wildcat offense did very little after the first drive until the game was out of hand. Credit Ron Prince for having his team ready to play (there was a reason Texas didn't throw down the field outside of a handful of times, and it wasn't simply the result of a Greg Davis gameplan); but don't overlook the fact that KSU beat Texas on the strength of a confluence of events that had never transpired in more than one hundred years of history.

    According to NCAA 2008...

    Oklahoma 24, Texas 6. The Horns amass a meager 17 yards rushing in a defensive game. Oklahoma's first-half punt return for a TD helps create a deficit that Texas cannot overcome.

    A Very Special Look Back through TWTWB, Past and Present

    Instead of posting just this week's TWTWB, I'm digging deep into the archives for snippets of past Red River Rivalry editions. If only they were plastered all over Bellmont Hall...


    Saturday afternoon was the perfect storm of a team that was vastly un-prepared to play, some bad breaks, a team struggling to replace experience and another team that wanted to show that last year wasn’t a fluke and they can play with the big boys. What we were left with was a stadium that sounded more like a failed comedian at the Apollo as fans showed their dissatisfaction for this coaching staff than the usual pre-OU game “BEAT OU” chants.

    So how do you bounce back?

    Easily. You be a man. Grow up and have some pride in your work. People do it across this great country of ours every single day of the week, I don’t think it’s asking too much for our football team to do the same in the span of a week.


    On Saturday afternoon, in the shadow of a giant Ferris Wheel, in a stadium where national championships were solidified for this program, amidst the smell of corn dogs and cotton candy and beneath the clatter of screams from the Midway, you’re going to face one pissed off Oklahoma team that lost last week. We’ll hear the little cannons from the Ruf Necks and hear Boomer Sooner 1,000 times.

    They’ll come out of their locker room into the infamous tunnel, talk trash to you, run to their sidelines, and then they’ll come out and hit you squarely in the mouth.

    Will you hit them back, Longhorns?

    Phoenix or San Antonio. Your choice. Plan it. Dream it. Do it.


    This isn’t Vince Young’s team anymore. I hope everyone took what they learned last year and built a good foundation, but this is Jamaal Charles’ team. This is Selvin Young’s team. This is Limas Sweed’s team. This is Kasey Studdard’s team. This is Tim Crowder’s team. This is Brian Robison’s team. This is Michael Griffin’s team. This is Colt McCoy’s team.

    Superman is gone. It’s time for the Legion of Super Heroes to save the day.


    James Brown. Butch Hadnot. Stoney Clark. Johnny Walker. Peter Gardere. Keith & Kerry Cash. Bubba Jacques.

    They all found their identity in this game, because this game is larger than Ohio State at home. It’s larger than a meaningless Rose Bowl victory over Michigan. This is bigger than the Horseshoe at night.

    It’s Texas/OU at the State Fair of Texas.

    There will be a lot of noise when Texas descends the ramp from the locker room to the Cotton Bowl field on Saturday afternoon. Insults will be hurled, boos will come down and profanities will be plentiful.

    But VY won't hear them. He'll be too busy singing to himself and getting his team ready. They have a game to win and a streak to end.

    And come Sunday morning the Cotton Bowl stands will be empty and the stadium quiet.

    Just like the Longhorns critics.

    The Week.

    Ask any Texas fan, and they know what you are talking about. Well, once you tell them that you aren't talking about The Week That Will Be.

    Texas/OU. A lot of Texas fans will tell you that this week is like Christmas to them, perhaps even better. Because instead of whip family gatherings, listening to the same stories from your aunt and your uncle ask what exactly it is again you do for a living, you get to have someone in your face calling you a cocksucker and waving an inverted school sign in your face.

    Ahhhhh yes.
    They Said It...

    "'We're not scared"

    - Colt McCoy
    I like seeing that from Colt, even if his brain may still be a little scrambled from last weekend. But it's not surprising. You can look up and down the Longhorn roster and not find a guy that epitomizes courage more than Texas' scrappy signal-caller. If the "we" in his statement includes Mack Brown and Greg Davis then don't count out Texas on Saturday.

    "We're focused"

    - Quan Cosby
    Better late than never, if true.

    "If I have to get to the quarterback 10 million times to help my team, that’s what I’ll do."

    - Brian Orakpo, who returns this week from a knee injury suffered against Arkansas State.

    Don't underestimate the impact Orakpo can have on this game. Our DEs have played very well in his absence, but to beat Oklahoma, Texas is going to need to make plays on defense. The Horns forced zero turnovers against KSU, and if Orakpo can get to Sam Bradford "10 million times" (or even three or four) then maybe he can rush Bradford into the mistake that turns into a game-changing play for Texas.

    The Things I Think About

    Austin-area TigerMarts offer free coffee on Monday mornings after a Longhorn win. The fine print states that this promotion will end on December 31, 2007. That's probably not a big deal, since Texas likely won't play in a New Year's (or later) Bowl this year anyway.

    In the Huddle with "Sir Rod"... and Friends

    "Sir Rod" Walker says:

    HUDDLE THE HELL UP!!! This is NOT Rice! This is not Texas State! This is not the Cleveland Browns! This is OKLAHOMA!! What the hell is a Sooner? (never mind...probably something similiar to an aggie) NOW... Like we 'always' say in the locker room... you can throw out the records, the coaches, AND last years film b/c when these two teams get together... oh what a time!!! There will be bells rung (that means someone will get the HELL knocked out of them), snot flyin'... (as a result to bell being rung)... helments rollin' around... (due to a few scuffles)... which means penalty after penalty... SO WHAT!!! That's why we play the game! Stop tryna be cute TEXAS and just line up and play smash mouth football! Run a regular 'I' formation w/a fullback and a tailback. InVINCEable isn't here anymore. Stop trying to have a throwin' Q.B. run so much. No one is scared if Colt keeps the ball and runs with it. There's no threat there! Get back to the basics. By the way... if we compared the 1990-94 team to this year's team... we'd kick their ass. They play soooo soft now!! Leave the air conditioned facilites to the NFL... get in the heat... to avoid defeat! MAN THE HELL UP!!! and.....HOOK'EM!!

    Stonie Clark says:

    As a 17 year old freshman, I remember guys like Lance Gunn and Peter Gardere standing up in the locker room talking about how big a rivalry Oklahoma was for 'us'. They talked about fans throwing things at you and spitting on you. Little old ladies talking like sailors and giving the horns down sign two inches from your face. I remember thinking, "I just want to play some football. Make a name for myself and these rivalries belong to the school, not me."

    By my junior year at UT, I was as much a part of this rivalry game in my heart and soul as any Longhorn before me and was about to become associated with it for the rest of my life.

    1994. Cotton Bowl. Red River Rivalry. 17-10 Texas. 4th and Goal. Ball on the Texas 1 yard line. I had heard the stories of Peter the Great. Cash, with the one handed touchdown catch. Bubba Jacques scooping up a fumble and returning it for a touchdown in a tight TX-OU game. When the center snapped the ball, their line zone blocked right. It was we refer to as a misdirection play. I was able to see Thompson handing the ball to James Allen on a statue of liberty play. Immediately I changed direction and headed toward the ball carrier. My teammate, Robert Reed had forced James Allen back inside and as he reached for the endzone, I hit him. It was a trainwreck. That God for making me a train. I rolled about 340 at the time and being run over was never a concern of mine. In some of the pictues of the play, my feet were actually in the endzone when I made contact. The hit was pure and the celebration started.

    Cotton Spryer. Peter the Great. Bubba Jacques. Kerry Cash... Stonie Clark.

    We all see Oklahoma has some vulnerabilities, and hopefully this week our coaching staff was able to identify some of those and put together a game plan that puts our guys in a position to win. That's all that can really be asked of the coaching staff. The rest has to be the guys wanting to be great. Wanting to be remembered. Have they dreamed and visualized making plays in this game? Do they want it so badly that the tears stream from their faces as they walk down the tunnel? Are they screaming inside because of the liquid fire running through their veins and up their spine? Folks, I save exaggerations for more important things like penis size and what age I actually was when I started losing my hair. This is real. This is TX-OU.

    Tailgate Talk

    In lieu of a tailgate we'll be meeting at Big Tex's right boot. Or not. The Texas Exes tent opens at 10:30 am, and for our group, the Old Mill Inn is a Texas-OU mainstay. I can't wait to drink a beer out of a wax paper cup and down a Fletcher's Corny Dog or three.

    A few other College Football-related Thoughts

  • So much for "Showdown Saturday."

  • I concur with CNNSI's Stewart Mandel on the over-use of "upset" in college football. Either parity reigns supreme or every win by a lower-ranked team is an upset. You can't have both.

  • LSU has about 35 times more talent than Oklahoma State had at any time during his era, but I cannot fathom any universe in which a Les Miles-coached team runs the table. If and when the Tigers drop a conference game this regular season people will blather on and on about the difficulty level of playing in the SEC. But don't discount the "Miles Effect."

  • Go Gators! (sort of)

  • USF fans should curl their fingers when they do their hand sign. NC State knows enough to vary the Hook'em sign just enough to avoid being blantant thieves.

  • NCAA football graduation rates are on the rise. Ten bucks says that someone out there cares about this. Okay, maybe five bucks (and no more than a quarter if we're talking about fans of the literacy-challenged SEC). I couldn't care less, and *my* team actually has academic requirements for athletes.
  • OU Still Sucks...

  • Fifteen Years Ago this Week

    (note: 2007 marks the 15-year anniversary of the Temple Wildcats' 1992 5A Div. II Texas State Championship, which came during my sophomore year of high school. I'll re-cap that season throughout the fall.)

    Danger, Will Robinson. Temple blows a 21-0 lead when their collective three-deep at RB develop the worst case of fumble-itis this side of Richard Walton. Waco High's Lions, long a thorn in the Wildcats' side, close the gap to seven and march deep into Temple territory in the game's final minute. Just as the Lions appear to have dashed Temple's perfect season (Waco coach Johnny Tusa later said he intended to kick the extra point and settle for the tie), a fourth down run off tackle sees the ballcarrier slip and fall less than a yard from the end zone. Temple survives with a 21-14 win and a 1-0 record in district play.

    Personal Anecdote Involving This Week's Opponent

    Prior to the 65-13 debacle in 2003, Matt and I joined our tailgate group for the first and only time at Dallas' Starlight Lounge, a seedy dive bar several blocks from Fair Park. Arriving at 7 am for cheap beer and debauchery before the game had become a tradition, of sorts. After the loss, Texas' fourth consecutive aginst OU, that tradition went the way of Bonfire, but without the self-righteous posturing. I learned this week that my friend and former roommate Robbi's lone trip to the Starlight came the day of OU's 63-14 thrasing of Texas in 2000. The thought then occurred to me... if you place any trust in the collective wisdom of the masses, which contend that Texas has absolutely no chance to exit the Cotton Bowl with anything better than another 40+ point loss, then perhaps we should venture back there for $1 Pearl Lights and whatever reverse mojo we can muster.

    Semi-Relevant Song Lyric that Takes Back a Few Years

    "Uh, now what y'all know bout them Texas boys, Comin' down in candied toys, smokin' weed and talkin' noise"

    - Jay-Z Big Pimpin' (actual lyric spoken by Pimp C)
    I read this lyric and all I can think of is how much Texas misses Ramonce Taylor, who would have been a senior bound for the NFL this year had he not been such a knucklehead. Ramonce's leaping TD grab in the first quarter of 2005's Red River Rivalry is when Texas fans knew that five years of misery would indeed die an overdue death.

    Deluded/Rational Thoughts from an Opposing Message Board

    The gang at SoonerFans.Com has penned five pages worth of Japanese poetry about the Red River Rivalry. I would have expected to find the Limereck as the literary style of choice among Sooner State poets.

    Some posts are funny:

    Colt is on the ground
    Mack is out of bail money
    Sooners roll again
    Topical... not too sophomoric...

    Sooners will bounce back
    Horns will leave early this year
    I will tear your sack
    I'm still trying to forget that story, but it's original...

    Longhorns terrorize Austin:
    Hold on... a five-syllable word on SoonerFans.Com? Impressive.

    Straight outta Austin:
    Crazy felons named Longhorns
    Who suck at football
    Hmmm... it's going downhill now...

    But this is just sad:

    I'm not sure what a Haikus is supposed to look like (even after a wikipedia search) but I'm pretty sure this is teh winnar!

    I really hope that's just some sort of SoonerFans.Com inside joke (ala "SpiderAg" on HornFans.Com), and not a serious post.

    The Greg Brown Memorial Pregame Premonition

    I keep having this thought that Texas shocks the nation and me and my friends "Crank that Soulja Boy" back at the Old Mill Inn afterward.

    Random Texas-OU pregame video that features two guys I really miss

    Prediction: Beer in wax paper cups, corny dogs dripping with mustard, and a bunch of white folks crankin' the Soulja Boy at the Old Mill Inn after the game!

    Bonus Prediction: Win or lose, OU STILL SUCKS!


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