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Wednesday, October 17, 2007

Texas Football: The Baylor Game 

Week Eight: No. 19 Texas (5-2) vs. Baylor (3-4)
Last Week: Texas 56, Iowa State 3; Kansas 58, Baylor 10
Last Meeting: Texas 63, Baylor 31 (2006)
All-Time Series: Texas leads, 70-22-4

Ten Years.

Baylor has not beaten Texas in ten years, and the only thing about that fact that amazes me more that it being a fact, is that is has only been ten years. Look at Texas and look at Baylor and try to make one rational argument as to why a lower tier athletic program like Baylor's could have ever won even twenty percent of its meetings with a power like Texas. Can you do it?

After drubbings of 63-31, 62-0, 44-14, 56-0, 41-0, 49-10, 48-14 and 62-0, it's hard to fathom that a Mack Brown-coached Texas team eked out a meager ten point win against Baylor in 1998, Brown's first year on the Forty Acres. It's even harder to fathom that Baylor actually beat Texas in John Mackovic's final season (okay, maybe that's not so unbelievable), or that from 1984-1992, the Bears posted a 6-3 head-to-head record against the Horns.

But that was the case for a significant portion of my 30 years. Playing Baylor used to mean something. In 1990 it meant ending a six-year Cotton Bowl drought in a win every bit as hard-fought as the Aggie game it preceded. In 1994 it meant clinching another conference title (forget the fact that it was five-way tie for second behind a probation-stricken Texas A&M). And in 1989, 1992 and 1997, it meant embarrasing losses that either kept Texas out of a bowl, or accentuated the fact that they were far too abysmal to even think about postseason play.

Now the Baylor game means an assured win, and in odd years, a chance to go drink beer at George's. Unless you're the Aggies. But that's a different story altogether.

This Week's Game in a Nutshell

Remember last week when I said that "Texas could start 11 Scott Derrys on defense" and win? Derry could play on offense in this one and Texas should still win. Hell, Texas could start Richard Walton at QB and have at least a 50 percent chance.

According to NCAA 2008...

This section was a bad idea. Or lame. Or both.

TWTWB is temporarily postponed while Matt tends to family business

Best wishes to Matt's dad, Gary!

They Said It...

"The three older linebackers have won a national championship and played really well for us and done some great things."

"There’s nothing on tape that says they should not [play]."

- Mack Brown and Duane Akina, respectively
Brown and Akina make a combined $4M+ per year to coach football, and I make considerably less to do... whatever the hell it is I do. But I have watched game replays solely to focus on the play of our LB corps, and I don't think you have to possess the football acumen of John Madden to see that Scott Derry consistently fails to make plays, or that Rashad Bobino consistenly runs his way directly into a block, or the Robert Killabrew consistently kills his team with, well...

"We couldn't see what happened on the tape. Robert is a really good kid who is an emotional player. But we told him that the official called it a penalty, so it's a penalty."

- Brown
Are you kidding me? The broadcast showed him lying on the ground with his hand firmly affixed to an opposing facemask. Just because he didn't "face rape" anyone doesn't mean he clearly did not commit a penalty.

"We don't know what the school record is for dead-ball penalties, but Robert Killebrew has to rank high on the list. Maybe it's time to change his jersey number to –15."

- The AA-S' "Third and Longhorns" postgame feature
No way. Robert is a really good kid who is an emotional player, and we really need to double check the tape before disparaging the contibution he makes to Texas Football.

The Things I Think About

So I have a wedding to attend Saturday at 5:30. If I stay with friends in Killeen on Friday night I can get to George's tent by 9:00 without having to wake up while it's still dark; I can stay at the game till 2:00, when it should be well in hand; and I can be on the road back to Austin in time to make it home by 4:00. That gives me a solid hour to get ready for the wedding. Now, how many pre-game and halftime beers can I consume without being that drunk guy exhaling Bud Light all over the bridal party?

Betcha Didn't Know

Baylor's Adam Stiles kicked a 28-yard field as time expired in the second quarter of the 2001 Texas-Baylor game, cutting the Horns' lead to 28-10. Texas has not surrendered a point to the Bears in Floyd Casey Stadium in the ten quarters since.

In the Huddle with "Sir Rod"... and Friends

"Sir Rod" Walker says:

Coming soon...

Stonie Clark says:

Coming soon...

Tailgate Talk

Pat Green enjoy's George's Bar. I settle for George's Tent. The ratio of burnt orange to green compares favorably to the ratio of burnt orange to green in the stands. I list burnt orange first because it's the dominant color in both venues.

A few other College Football-related Thoughts

  • Me, last week in this space:

    "LSU fans are obnoxious. I cannot wait until that team gets beat"
    Kentucky 43, LSU 37. Nice.

  • Oklahoma fans are obnoxious. I cannot wait until that team gets beat.

  • Boise State and Wake Forest played in BCS bowls a year ago. Boston College and South Florida could play in BCS Bowls three months from now. And people complain about a Rockies-Indians World Series?

  • A Javorskie Lane guarantee is worth even less than the street value of a ticket to this weekend's Nebraska Texas A&M game.

  • Half of the Big 12 is currently ranked -- Oklahoma, Mizzou, Kansas, Texas, Texas Tech and Kansas State. So of course that means that Colorado humiliates a Kansas team that actually has to travel more than 80 miles for a game, a rejuvenated Oklahoma State trips up Kansas State, and the loser of Tech-Mizzou plummets, meaning that half of that half finds themselves in the "others receiving votes" section come Sunday afternoon.

  • Callahan-Franchione. Getcha resume ready!.

  • OU Still Sucks...

  • Fifteen Years Ago this Week

    (note: 2007 marks the 15-year anniversary of the Temple Wildcats' 1992 5A Div. II Texas State Championship, which came during my sophomore year of high school. I'll re-cap that season throughout the fall.)

    Temple beat either Killeen Ellison or Copperas Cove. I don't really remember which. No matter, it was a mauling.

    Personal Anecdote Involving This Week's Opponent

    My girlfriend attended Baylor. Misguided though she was, she owns the coolest Bulldog, who I have to admit looks pretty cool in his Baylor jersey. Sic'em, or somesuch.

    Semi-Relevant quotes from The Big Lebowski

    "So every time--I just want to understand this, sir-- every time a rug is micturated upon in this fair city, I have to compensate the-- "

    - The Big Lebowski (not the dude)
    "It's a shame that the Chinaman pissed on your rug, Dude... It really tied the room together."

    - Walter Sobchak
    "The carpet pissers did this?

    - Donny
    I know I wore out The Big Lebowski quotes last year, but leave it to a Baptist school to make uriation a topical matter. And when you're looking for quotes about pissing, look no forther than the Coen Brothers' classic. By now everyone has heard about Baylor assistant coach Eric Schnupp, who had a run-in with the law after relieving himself on a Waco bar last weekend. And here I thought lawlessness at Baylor was limited to skinning cats and shooting teammates.

    Was that last one too harsh?

    Deluded/Rational Thoughts from an Opposing Message Board

    Bayloybear134 wonders: "If we win this saturday will it change your opinion towards Morriss?"

    The lunacy of the premise aside (the whole "winning this Saturday"), Baylor fans should simply count their blessings that Guy Morriss isn't Bill Callahan or Dennis Franchione.

    The Greg Brown Memorial Pregame Premonition

    Robert Killabrew gets a personal foul.

    Random Texas-Baylor highlight that reinforces my opening paragraph

    Before Bo Scaife, David Thomas or Jermichel Finley, there was Pat Fitzgerald...

    Prediction: Baylor's home scoreless streak against the Horns ends... in yet another blowout loss.



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