Friday, April 30, 2004
Astros Notes, 4/30
I hate the Cincinnati Reds. I can't stand them. Over the years, they are far and away my least favorite baseball team. Marge Scott, Chris Sabo, Rob Dibble, Norm Charlton, Barry Larkin... they all made my blood boil. The whole organization could fold and I'd celebrate with fireworks and street-dancing. So now that I've made it clear where I stand on the Reds... tonight they invade Minute Maid Park for a weekend set. A few thoughts:
- Dream scenario for tonight's game... Roger Clemens beans the first three batters, and then strikes out the side, just to screw with them.
- Ricky Stone was optioned to AAA yesterday. That shoudl serve as a notice to the Astros pen. If you don't pitch well, the club has ample enough depth to ship you back to Sticksville.
- Top 10 Astros memory... Sept. 5, 1995... Recently acquired catcher Pat Borders, apparently tired of his teammates soft attitude and willingness to get pushed around by a thuggish Reds club, ignites some life in his teammates. A brawl erupts during the mid innings that features Borders swinging away like Davey Crockett at The Alamo. Houston goes on to beat Cincinnati, 10-1, the lone Astros win against the Reds that season.
- Andy Pettitte's stellar outing yesterday has the vaunted Astros rotation looking every bit as good as the offseason hype made them appear.
- A win tonight would secure a 13-9 April record. For the, er, record, the 99 Astros, winners of 97 games and the NL Central, also turned in a 13-9 April mark. That team featured two 20-game winners, by the way, a feat that this Astros squad could potentially match.
- f 1300 The Zone, by the way. Yesterday's game wasn't on TV, I guess because they played in the afternoon. But 1300, which has to be the worst Astros affiliate in the State, didn't air it either. I tuned in expecting to hear Milo yell "Holy Toledo!" Instead I got, "Hey Romey, thanks for the vine. Your smack is fresh." It's bad enough that the lone entertaining personality is a former MTV Real World cast member, but when they shun the Astros in favor of The Jungle, I get annoyed.
-Here's a funny stat I saw the other day. Roger Clemens has a better BA and OBP than either former teammate Derek Jeter or Alex Rodriguez. Go get'em Roger!
- Great line from Stain's OWA Reds preview: "a chance to thump the upstart Reds on top of their knotty heads is always a good thing." Damn straight.
- As always, Stain has a few more classics:
"This series reminds me of standing at a urinal next to a dumbass. We’re just minding our own business while we try to keep our eyes straight ahead, and the fucking Reds are hopping around next to us, yapping about being in second place, flapping their vests, and splashing piss everywhere. And probably trying to sneak a glimpse of our dick while we aren’t watching."
and...
"I knew a guy from Cincinnati who was a complete asshole. In fact, last I heard he was living in Houston. So if you go to a game this weekend and see a guy in a Reds hat who looks like a douche bag, kick him in the nuts for me."
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- Dream scenario for tonight's game... Roger Clemens beans the first three batters, and then strikes out the side, just to screw with them.
- Ricky Stone was optioned to AAA yesterday. That shoudl serve as a notice to the Astros pen. If you don't pitch well, the club has ample enough depth to ship you back to Sticksville.
- Top 10 Astros memory... Sept. 5, 1995... Recently acquired catcher Pat Borders, apparently tired of his teammates soft attitude and willingness to get pushed around by a thuggish Reds club, ignites some life in his teammates. A brawl erupts during the mid innings that features Borders swinging away like Davey Crockett at The Alamo. Houston goes on to beat Cincinnati, 10-1, the lone Astros win against the Reds that season.
- Andy Pettitte's stellar outing yesterday has the vaunted Astros rotation looking every bit as good as the offseason hype made them appear.
- A win tonight would secure a 13-9 April record. For the, er, record, the 99 Astros, winners of 97 games and the NL Central, also turned in a 13-9 April mark. That team featured two 20-game winners, by the way, a feat that this Astros squad could potentially match.
- f 1300 The Zone, by the way. Yesterday's game wasn't on TV, I guess because they played in the afternoon. But 1300, which has to be the worst Astros affiliate in the State, didn't air it either. I tuned in expecting to hear Milo yell "Holy Toledo!" Instead I got, "Hey Romey, thanks for the vine. Your smack is fresh." It's bad enough that the lone entertaining personality is a former MTV Real World cast member, but when they shun the Astros in favor of The Jungle, I get annoyed.
-Here's a funny stat I saw the other day. Roger Clemens has a better BA and OBP than either former teammate Derek Jeter or Alex Rodriguez. Go get'em Roger!
- Great line from Stain's OWA Reds preview: "a chance to thump the upstart Reds on top of their knotty heads is always a good thing." Damn straight.
- As always, Stain has a few more classics:
"This series reminds me of standing at a urinal next to a dumbass. We’re just minding our own business while we try to keep our eyes straight ahead, and the fucking Reds are hopping around next to us, yapping about being in second place, flapping their vests, and splashing piss everywhere. And probably trying to sneak a glimpse of our dick while we aren’t watching."
and...
"I knew a guy from Cincinnati who was a complete asshole. In fact, last I heard he was living in Houston. So if you go to a game this weekend and see a guy in a Reds hat who looks like a douche bag, kick him in the nuts for me."
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